There was and will be blood.

So, we're sittin' there watchin' my favorite movie of all time when whats-his-face gets all pissed off that we're not watchin' his favorite movie about the lady who dresses her kids in the curtains.

I'm like, "Mofo, you're an actor now, ya gotta watch movies wit' what they call method men, who, like these guys here, in this movie, really do in real life, what they gonna do before they do it for pretend."



Well, the next mornin' I'm eatin' my cornflakes and there's whats-his-face starin' in my window like some pervert. Turns out he was cast as Healy, that goofy bastard stalker in "Something About Mary".



But, it was cool when he got the part of the servant boy in Kiterunner. He was servicin' me right and left...



Then, a few months later, all excited he tells me he gets the part of Corleone in the remake of my favorite movie of all time. So, I'm like, "Which Corleone, mofo?"

He forgot and told me he would just method all of them...



Well, every time I turned around he was comin' at me, tryin' to purge me from this earth.



But I work out more, so I can take his ass...





But that didn't stop him...he just found people who didn't work out.so much...



Finally, I was like, "This ain't "The Killin' Fields", muthafucka!"

My tuition told me that whats-his-face was missin' something...something I think they call newants. That means actin' wit' out killin' people. So, nice guy that I am, I played Frito...as you can see here...and I think I got across to him, that newants thing, pretty good.



I even let him kiss me...in public...on the mouth...



Well, the next part he got was in a remake of that movie where they break yo back on a mountain. In my most menacing tone,  I was like, "Don't even think about tryin' to take me to some mountain to break my back...I'll break yo's in half befo' yo' even know what hit ya.".



So, the next day, Father Fitzfruity pops out from nowhere and greets us with, "Top o' the mornin' to ye! Are you two fairies ready?"

I'm like, "Who yo' callin' a fairy...and ready for what?"

Lookin' at whats-his-face kind of confused, Father Fitzfruity responds wit', "To become hoosband and hoosband, of kerse."

"Sure Father...get on wit' it." I responded, much to my surprise, still not understandin' what this had to do wit' breaking backs on mountains, but fully understandin' a "star" was in the makin'.



And so it was...a star was made. Yeah, I know...muh beautiful boy don't look so beautiful below, and it was a muthafuckin' chore to talk pretty boy into makin' his face like this, but I did it 'cause I'm strong like that.

Anyways, he scored...but even more importantly, wit' blood all ova the fuckin' place, sweat and tears, I scored.